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Children aren’t born knowing how to regulate their emotions. They first borrow calm from the adults around them. Co-regulation means we lend our steady presence through voice, pacing, body language, and responsiveness until children learn to do it for themselves.
How It Works in Daily Life
How It Works in Daily Life
A parent slows their breathing while sitting beside an anxious child.
A teacher waits silently, offering a reassuring smile instead of rushing in with instructions.
A therapist mirrors a child’s rhythm in play, then gently introduces small shifts to model flexibility.
These moments signal: “You are safe. We can manage this together.”
Why It Matters
Why It Matters
Builds Safety — Children sense when adults are calm, and borrow that steadiness.
Encourages Reflection — Instead of reacting impulsively, they learn to pause and process.
Supports Social Growth — Emotional attunement paves the way for empathy and perspective-taking.
Lays the Foundation for Self-Regulation — Over time, children internalize the skills modeled by adults.
An RDI® Perspective
An RDI® Perspective
In RDI®, co-regulation is not about controlling a child’s emotions, but about guiding. We create space for children to experience their feelings while helping them discover ways to regain balance. A crucial step for long-term emotional and social growth.
Want more guidance on building co-regulation into everyday life? Download our free ebook, Supporting Neurodivergent Children with Confidence. Explore how RDI® equips you to nurture emotional regulation in children through our free RDI® Made Simple course.
Contributed by
Genevieve Chua
Educational Psychologist and RDI® Training Director (Southeast Asia and Australia)
Children's Partnership
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